UUUUUUGGGGGHHHH
this week

The farmer's market was at ASU while I was out and about today, and on a whim I bought some apple butter.  Mmmm. Delicious. I need to learn how to make this.

It's COLD HERE! I'm using my Snuggie.

UUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH

too much work to be done

Last day in Florida :(
These next two weeks are going to be crazy stressful.

Yup.

I locked my keys in my car for the first time ever tonight. In a mall parking lot. While I happened to be wearing a bright pink, sparkly prom gown...and it was 11:45 PM. Derp.

Wellp, today is Thanksgiving, and it was a good one. I am thankful to have such a wonderful, wonderful, wonderful family, for the our good health, and for all the little ways that God blesses my life. I wish that my brother could be here, but we still laughed at you while watching home movies, Craig :) Hope you had someone special to spend the holiday with!

No. 11 on the charts, recommended by a Classical musician:


I throw my hands up in the air sometimes
Saying ay-oh, gotta let go

I had a doctor's appointment today... I have not gained weight. My grandpa is makin' stuff up.

Also my blood pressure is 92/64.  This is in the range which is normal for athletes and children. I fit somewhat into both of these categories: I am indeed an athlete (although the only sport I play is ultimate), and my height and weight are average for the category of girls between the ages of 12 to 13. Lucky me.

The very first thing my grandpa said after he saw me today was, "Looks like you've gained some weight, huh?"

???

Guess what dudes...I am in FLORIDA!

I watch this show called "The Biggest Loser." I watch because I like it; I don't have to give any more explanation than that.

This show bring in contestants that are very, very overweight. The point of the show is for these contestants to lose weight. By losing weight, they change their lives....they change their attitude towards themselves...they inspire the people around them.  They increase their lifespan.  They learn how to raise healthy children. 

These contestants diet and work out very hard--something like 8 hours a day.  There is a weigh-in every week to determine how much weight each contestant has lost.  It's completely normal to see a contestant losing 7 pounds in a week--that's a pound per day.  How much work does it take to lose a pound per day for a week?  A lot of work, that's the answer. I've seen some of the biggest guys lose 20+ pounds in a week. It's amazing.

However, sometimes contestants don't lose that much weight.  Sometimes the biggest guy on the show will only lose 1 or 2 pounds in a week.  And sometimes, they are dumbfounded.  "I did everything I was supposed to do!" they will say.  And yet they still don't lose any weight (relatively).

Weight loss is a funny thing.  You can work hard and do everything you are supposed to do and still see no results. Nobody exactly knows why this happens. Maybe it's related to stress.  Maybe it's related to sleep patterns. Maybe it's hormones.

It's the same in life, I think.  Sometimes you can do everything that you are supposed to do, and things will still not turn out the way that you would have liked.  Maybe you will lose a pound one week only to gain it back the next week.  It's frustrating.  But you know what? If you keep working hard, dieting, and exercising, you will lose weight eventually.  If you keep at it, you will see results. You will reach your goal. The question is...how much do you really want it?

I think I really need a break. I have been running all cylinders lately. With Paul gone, I don't take time out anymore to just rest. I've been working, practicing, performing, and still things don't seem to get done... it's been too much. I just have SO MUCH on my plate right now! I need a break, I really do.

I had a pretty trippy dream last night about flying on a picnic table.

BUT...the night before, I had my old "can't control my car" stress dream. It's the only reoccurring dream I ever have. The brakes don't work, the car drives in reverse when I tell it to move forward...I remembered to use my emergency brake in the dream this time, but it still took a good minute to stop completely.  I ran into a lot of things with my car.

I am afraid of not being able to control my car...not being able to control my life.

Is faith something that you know you have when you have it?

Today was the best day. I am a little tipsy right now, so I don't know if this is going to make any sense, just bear with me. This morning I competed in the Arizona Flute Society college competition, did well, and then drove to the fields to compete in ULTIMATE FINALS DAY! I was a little late to the first game, but we won big, something like 15-5. Our second game was a great match up--two even teams, battling it out for a spot in semifinals. We were so even that our points lasted forever. We lost the game because the time ran out. It was disappointing, of course, but I can't say that I didn't expect it--we were slated to lose, according to the books.

This is also the first time I have seen Paul in a week--he's been in Israel on a business trip, and he's leaving tomorrow for a 10-day trip to Hawaii! So this is our one day together (a day on which I have a flute competition and ultimate finals...derp).

Anyway, the rest of finals day was awesome. I had a cheeseburger, chatted with my teammates and other friends, dranik a little too much, played JUG, and heckled the finals game obnoxiously and stupidly. In the middle of all of the excitement, I won a raffle prize!!! I won a package from 5 ultimate, winning a skirt, two sweet jerseys, two pairs of shorts (small and XS...they will fit!), a jacket, a headband, and wristbands. A great deal for only spending $5 on raffle tickets!!!

When I finally got home, I learned that I won the flute competition that I competed in in the morning. Stellar. All around, a win day.

Tomorrow is our quartet recital--the Fiesta Four! Should be good (if I am in a condition to play...don't tell my quartet).

I'm playing in a flute competition tomorrow. I need to bring a copy of my piece for the judges, but I had forgotten to make a copy until now (honestly, this is something I used to do all the time in high school. I thought I was past making copies for judges??). Anyway, I never like to go to bed without all my "homework" done, so I went out at 10:30 at night seeking a copier. First I tried Safeway right down the street. They had a working copier, and I managed to make a copy of one page before it ran out of paper. Dang it! I wasn't going to bother the employees to get more paper (they were having a crisis already involving a broken bottle of alcohol).

So I thought that I would go to the CVS near the music school and practice a bit after making copies. I drive there and they have a copier too! The machine wouldn't accept my money though...my coins fell straight through into the coin giver-back slot. So I asked the employee there what the deal was. She said that if it was doing that, then it's broken. Dang it! She recommended a Walgreens that I could try on the same street. So I drove there.

When I got there, I walked the parameter of the store in search of a copier. No dice. I asked the employee if they had a copier. They didn't.

Life, you win. I can't make a copy tonight. I drove back home in defeat and started writing this post.

Wah wah.

Edit: Searched for the sheet music online...and found it! No copies needed. Copiers are big jerks anyway.

Sometimes I am looking at pictures on facebook and I get jealous of how beautiful other girls are. Does that make any sense?

Probably not, but it happens anyway.

Can't sleep!

I LOVE FALL CHICKEN(S)!!!

Three sonatas on my spring recital! Yikes! Better get crackin'!

My throat is feeling much better, thanks for asking.

A new student called today. Up to 6 now! Can you believe it?? What a blessing.

I think I like Settlers of Catan a little too much. Or...a lot too much.

I got hit in the throat with an extremely fast-moving frisbee today. I know that that's a funny thing to say, but right now it is funny and sucks at the same time, cause it kinda feels like a bad case of strep throat. Hurts to swallow, hurts to talk, hurts in general.

PSA: Kids. Don't get hit in the throat with a frisbee.

First ever studio recital with my own students today! And then maybe the return of Sunday pickup! Woohoo!

This world would be so much better if people were just nice.

How many times have I written this in my blog? Be nice. Don't be mean. Be nice.

Sigur Ros was formed to soothe the aching soul.

Man, what is it with me this week? I just do not want to do anything. I've practiced for like 2 hours total in the past three days. Not good, Ashley. When you have high aspirations, you have to work. These things don't happen by themselves.

I like Vampire Weekend!

I wish I had more time to talk to my friends in FL. Whenever I call someone, it's always, "oh my gosh, it has been so long! much too long!" But I don't really have that much free time, and anyway I have many friends I would like to stay in contact with, and of course my parents always get first priority when it comes to call time, and in the end, I just can't call everyone as much as I would like. It's sad :(

League is heating up as we approach playoffs and finals. I'm not really sure what to think about my team at this point. I think we are good enough to make it to finals, but a lot of things need to fall in our favor for that to happen. In any case, as a first-time captain and a young-un at that, I am just glad that we managed to have a winning record in the regular season and that I did not cause anybody on my team to quit. That means I've done my job, right?

Paul is teaching me how to solve a Rubik's Cube.
We both think it's fun.

Fall Chickens put up a good fight tonight, but only having half of our team (among our missing were our first round guy and girl) was too much. We lost, and it didn't feel good.  The hecklers were annoying the heck out of me (if I was the cursing type, I would have cursed.... a lot). I played well in the first half, but near the end everything seemed to go wrong. I got handblocked. I failed to D a scoring huck that I definitely could have prevented. I got stalled out. It was not pretty.

It's funny how much I can be cheered up by something so simple like Paul playing with my hair.

Two days and no posts...I guess my creative (or...un-creative) juices are low right now.

Go away McAfee! Nobody likes you!