Hey dudes. I'm finally leaving Tally today. Bout time. I'm heading east to hang with my buddy Josh for a few days, then back home for a work/practice/party frenzy. I still have a lot of schoolwork to do, unfortunately.

Anywayzzz, I'm finally completely back to normal, which is AWESOME! I wouldn't wish that virus on anyone. T'was not fun.

Kay, I'm going crazy. Peace out dudes.

I had a flying dream.

I had wings.
Great, white wings. With feathers.
I soared across Tallahassee,
which had a large lake in the middle of it.

It was awesome.

You know, I never thought I'd say this, but I'm BORED! I'm still not well enough to play flute, so I've just been lying around, watching tv and movies. Tetris isn't working so I've turned to freecell which I can't play because I keep losing and I get mad (I just need to get back into the groove...). I've turned to schoolwork to keep me occupied...bleh.

A week is much too long a time to have minimal human interaction.

My grandparents have been married for 61 years.
That makes them cooler than you.

Hey, I finally feel a little bit better today!
I'm over the hill!

By the way, in the span of two days, I have completely obliterated a box of tissues and an entire gallon of gatorade...and that's just my auxillery drink. Watch out, citrus punch...you're next.

Yeah, I'm drinking enough fluids. :) :) :)
(smiley colors in honor of the gatorade flavors I have experienced)

Hey dudes, I've come to a conclusion: the antibiotics aren't doing anything! Wee!

Yup, I'm still sick as a mad hatter (and now I'm starting to say stuff like that). Actually, I'm not saying much these days because I can hardly talk!

But at least school is over now and I don't have to worry about missing class. Course, now I'm missing whatever fun I could be having during spring break, I don't know which one is worse.

I cancelled the Memphis trip, so I won't be playing for Ian Clarke. :( Oh well, at least I made the alternate happy (if there is an alternate...)

I have to say, I haven't been this badly sick since a time I can't remember. I never missed a day in school in high school because I was sick, and I very rarely skip classes because I am sick. Even if I do, it will be for a day tops. I have missed class for four straight days now. It's a little scary because I'm not really getting noticably better day to day. Maybe I am and the reconvery is just going so slow that I can't tell. I don't know.

Bottom line: I'm still very sick. Send your love but please don't make me talk. If you have any spare prayers in your pocket, please send this way. Being sick is just no fun.

I went back to Thagard and demanded a throat culture to test for strep.

I don't have strep either.

However, they did perscribe me antibiotics this time. I haven't decided if they're helping or not. My mom said they should help if I have a different strain of strep, if I have an ear infection, or if I have pnemonia. And she would know, because she just took a class in pharmocology. So there.

The antibiotics had an unpleasant side effect that I don't really want to talk about.

I woke up today to a 100.6 temp, which is actually pretty low considering what it has been. My throat still hurts like a madman, and my nose is running like a faucet. I actually had to sleep with a barrier of tissues between me and my pillow (I know, you were just aching for that info.) Speaking of aching, every inch of my body...covered in snakes. (inside joke)

So to conclude, looks like one more day of misery ahead of me. YAY.

Yup, still feel terrible.

So here's the deal: I'm really sick.
It was pretty bad yesterday, but I felt even worse when I woke up today. I've slept all day, and my mom finally convinced me that I should go to Thagard. When I got there, they stuck a swab up my nose and took some blood, only to tell me that I have neither the flu nor mono. Thanks, Thagard!

They don't know what I have, but they say it will probably last 1-2 weeks. So I don't know about going to class, going to Memphis, doing anything fun over spring break, or playing flute for the next while (btw, I have a nasty cold sore on my lip as a result of this virus. yay). I'll have to wait it out.

I feel pretty terrible if I don't take apsirin, but it's bearable if I'm drugged up. It helps everything but the nasty cough. Reminds me of the cough I used to get every winter in New York.

So that's been my life for the past two days.

UUUGHGGHHH

So miserable right now

Those old medeival fogies had it right. Three is the perfect division.

True story:

About three years ago, a musician friend and I were driving to school together. We were listening to a new recording of Appalachian Spring that I had just purchased and making up a story to go along with the music. We created a story about a pioneer couple, making their new life in America. Building their home and their town. The seasons go by, they marry. They have trouble with the winter and the wildlife, but they push through and they ultimately create America.

When we reached school, I read the liner notes to find out what the piece is really about. Turns out that we had created in our heads the exact plot of the ballet. We had correctly guessed the entire plot through the music alone.

Aaron Copland is a very good composer.

Laize, that's what I am. Today and yesterday and the day before that. It's been an easy week, a good week, and I have been happy. But man, have I been laize.

Random fact: My future roomate is seventeen inches taller than me.

Dr. Jones:
If you give a dart to a monkey (you don't generally give darts to monkeys)

Musicians are such babies sometimes, I swear. It's enought to drive you crazy. I'm not talking about anybody in particular, this has been a post long coming. But really, people, you are making music, not running a marathon. You can have a lesson the same day as a recital. You can even have a rehearsal the same day as a recital. You can have a lesson, a coaching, a rehearsal, AND a recital all the same day. This is what you signed up to do for the rest of your life, remember?

I say this as a flute player, and I understand it's a little different with brass players (and maybe even strings or vocalists, I don't know). But really, just stop complaining and suck it up. Seriously.

Guess who's playing Maslanka Symphony no. 3 for her next band concert?

This guy.

While you're at it, check out THIS one:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bXiJYcK4-GU
This was a real show

and I'm pretty sure I watched it at least once in my life.

By the way, I was in a competition in Atlanta, and I got second place again. That's what I was expecting, though. It was like Rocky against Apollo Creed:

"I can't do it...I can't beat him...I been out there walkin' around, thinkin'. I mean, who am I kiddin'? I ain't even in the guy's league...I was thinkin', it really don't matter if I lose this fight...'Cause all I wanna do is go the distance."

In any case, it was a fun competition!

Here's some funny cartoon clips that I found while I should have been doing homework:

(me on sugar): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ICFQmvECFdg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qk8zxUj_q9Y
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6zQgKk3g7Uo&feature=related
Rocko doesn't have it good: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uhH2J4LkOCM&feature=related
Bobby's World!: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GqQjpTbHR0A

Hello friends.
Please make good life choices.
Please learn from your mistakes.
Just because you are not tied down
by a particular person or thing,
that doesn't mean that you can do whatever you want.

Think about what your morals are,
and act upon them.

Okay, I probably shouldn't post this, but it's too funny to pass up. Yu Chen in an email:

"Good luke on this week end."

Craig and I had a discussion about aliens the other day. We agreed that if intelligent life does exist, it probably wouldn't want to come here because all we would do is try to kill it. I mean, really, can you think of any alien movie where the humans don't at some point try to kill the alien?

Craig: "Aliens are probably like, they kill each other! Why would I want to go there?"

P.S. According to the Worst-Case Scenerio Survival Guide trivia game, the best way to attack an alien is to go for the eyes. DON'T wave your arms around erratically and then punch it in the mouth.

Did you know Paganini had all his teeth removed to have a more gaunt appearance? Music history truly is fascinating. Sometimes.

Hello! My name is Ashley Stahl, and I am a hard-core fan of the major league baseball team, the New York Yankees. Now let me ask you—does this information raise or lower your opinion of me? If you are like a huge number of Americans, this will lower your opinion of me. Trust me, as a fan of the Yankees, I know. As soon as people find out I am a Yankees fan, I immediately get responses like, “And I thought I liked you,” or “How could you?” or simply “I’m so sorry.” The Yankees are just one of those teams that a baseball fan will either love or hate. To put it in the words of famed Chicago Tribute columnist Mike Royko, “Hating the Yankees is as American as pizza pie, unwed mothers, and cheating on your income tax.”

But why do people hate the Yankees so much? That’s what I would like to explain today. There are three reasons I’ve found that people give for hating the Yankees: their extreme wealth, their wild success, and their deeply-rooted rivalries.

So let’s move on to the first of those reasons: money.

It’s no secret that the Yankees are filthy rich. The Yankees are seen as the snobby rich kid of the baseball industry. And nobody likes the snobby rich kid. Let me give you some numbers to let you know just how rich the Yankees are. (writes on board)
21.6 million
22.7 million
23.4 million
24.3 million

According to USA Today’s online salary database, this first figure was the salary of the Yankees’ ever-popular shortstop Derek Jeter last year. 21.6 million dollars. This second figure was the salary of the Yankees’ third baseman, Alex Rodriguez, also known as A-Rod. The third figure was the salary of the Yankees’ designated hitter, Jason Giambi. And this last number, well, this number represents the payroll of the entire team, the Tampa Bay Devil Rays.

I think the numbers here speak for themselves. I’m not going to deny the fact that the Yankees are rich. According to a December 2003 article from ESPN.com news services, their wealth has even dubbed them “The Evil Empire” But where does all of this money come from?

Well, that brings me to the next reason why people hate the Yankees, which is success.

For those of you who aren’t baseball fans, the world series is the like super bowl of baseball—it’s the highest honor a team can reach in a year. And the Yankees, well, they have won the world series a lot of times. I mean A LOT of times. 26 times, in fact. They’ve BEEN to the world series 39 times. Think about this for a second—if you average these figures into the total amount of world series, the Yankees have appeared in the series an average of every 2.7 years and they have won an average of every four years. If you take into consideration that there are currently 30 major league baseball teams, these numbers seem more than a bit lopsided. It’s a fact that the Yankees are not only the most successful team in major league baseball history, but also the most successful team in North American professional sports history, passing the ice hockey team the Montreal Canadiens, who only have a measly 24 national titles.

With all this success, it’s no wonder that people hate the Yankees! If you’re a fan of any other baseball team, chances are that your hopes and dreams have at one point been thwarted by the Yankees. I can see how it can be infuriating.
And no team feels this more than the Boston Red Sox. The third reason why people hate the Yankees is because of their rivalry with the Red Sox.

According to the Washington Post staff writer Dave Sheinin in his March 2005 article “Red Sox-Yankees is Difficult to Top,” the rivary between the Yankees and the Red Sox are one of the fiercest and most bitter in all of sports. It’s natural—they’re two good teams in the same division, always fighting for the top place. But this is more than a normal rivalry. This is HATRED. Well, mostly the Red Sox hate the Yankees, not the other way around.

The Boston Red Sox were one of the most successful teams at the turn of the century and the beginning of organized professional baseball. The Yankees, then known as the Highlanders, were, well, less than great. This all changed, though, with one event, which has been dubbed “The curse of the Bambino.” Some of you may know the story. The Red Sox are bought by new owner Harry Frazee. Frazee sells Babe Ruth to the Yankees to pay off personal debts. BABE RUTH, people! He sold BABE RUTH!

Since then, the Red Sox have been the most unfortunate team in baseball, always losing to the Yankees by a microscopic margin. Boston has created endless stories of hard losses; one could make a whole speech about these sob stories. Between the years 1920 and 2003, the Yankees won 26 world series, and Boston won zero. Boston is the eternal underdog; the Yankees are the Evil Empire.

Only recently has Boston seemed to have been able to break the curse, winning the world series in 2004 and 2007. These wins, though, have only served to intensify the rivalry between the two teams who seemed destined to hate each other for all of time.

To conclude, I hope that this presentation has given you some insight as to why people hate the Yankees. I’ve gone over three reasons: their wealth, their success, and their rivalry with the Boston Red Sox. I am far from trying to convince you to hate the Yankees, though, as you already know that I am a Yankees fan. Despite their shortcomings, I love my team, and I will be watching them and cheering for them until the day I die. I think the great Joe DiMaggio said it best when he said, “I’d like to thank the good Lord for making me a Yankee.” Thank you.

Someone please ask me what I am doing so I can say "makin bacon."

Cuz, you know, that's what I'm doing.

I am such a carnivore.

For me, February 14th is not Valentine's Day, nor is it Singles Awareness Day.
For me, February 24th is CHOCOLATE DAY.

And what a wonderous day it is.

P.S. Craig and I just played "Baba O'Reily" by The Who on guitar and baroque flute. I'm sure going to miss this daily craziness next year...

This wasn't a normal day.
Things are simpler at home.
I miss my friends.
Life is short, friends. Be nice.

(Rounding up to the nearest 100 thousand)
2007 salaries:

Jason Giambi: $23.4 million
A-Rod: $22.7 million
Derek Jeter: $21.6 million

The entire Tampa Bay Devil Rays: $24.3 million

Cheetahs are beautiful creatures. If you've ever had a chance to see a cheetah in person, you know what I'm talking about.

It has been cured by Norah Jones and tetris. And...food.

I have the biggest headache in the history of the world.
Or just the history of my life.

Wow...that weekend went fast.

I just saw 27 Dresses, and now I want to go to a wedding. Or have a weddding. Or fall in love, or watch someone fall in love, or....have James Marsden bug me for a date.

In the past two weeks, two bills have been filed to the Florida Congress:
Senate Bill 1320 and
House Bill 813

Their aim is to increase Bright Futures funding for who pursue degrees within of the fields of:
Science
Technology
Engineering
Mathematics
Education
Nursing/Health Professions
by decreasing funding to all students pursuing degrees outside of those fields.

The bill, if passed will go into effect on July 1, 2008, thus affecting EVERYONE in Fall of 2008. The bill aims to do the following:

1. Florida Academic Scholars:
100% tuition --> 80% tuition for non-S.T.E.M.E.N. students
--> 110% tuition for S.T.E.M.E.N. students
$600 books --> $475 for non-STEMEN students
--> $660 for STEMEN students

2. Florida Academic Scholars with the higest academic ranking per school district:
$1500 scholarship --> $1200 for non-STEMEN students
--> $1650 for STEMEN students

3. Florida Medallion Scholars:
75% tuition --> 55% for non-STEMEN students
--> 85% for STEMEN students

4. Florida Gold Seal Vocational Schlars:
75% tuition --> 55% for non-STEMEN students
--> 85% for STEMEN students

Join the "Save Bright Futures" facebook group. Send your parents, teachers, professors, and friends to savebrightfutures.org and tell them to start papering the capital with complaint letters. Voices matter and the more of them that chant "NO," the better our chances of defeating these horrible pieces of legislation.For more information:

You can get your congressman's address and your "Vote NO!" letter here:
http://grove.ufl.edu/~democrat/bfutures/index.html

You can preview the proposed bills here:SB1320: http://www.flsenate.gov/session/index.cfm?BI_Mode=ViewBillInfo&Mode=Bills&SubMenu=1&Year=2008&billnum=1320

And here:H813: http://www.myfloridahouse.gov/Sections/Bills/billsdetail.aspx?BillId=38293&SessionIndex=-1&SessionId=57&BillText=&BillNumber=813&BillSponsorIndex=0&BillListIndex=0&BillStatuteText=&BillTypeIndex=0&BillReferredIndex=0&HouseChamber=H&BillSearchIndex=0


-----------------------------------------------------------

Seriously, this Jeremy Ring guy has got to be a complete idiot to think this is a good idea.

Get a move on! This YOUR money we are talking about.

When I was little, I was convinced that if I stepped in a certain pattern, if I moved in a certain way, I would unlock the portal to another dimension. I only had a vaugue definition of what "dimension" meant, but I knew that I didn't want to unlock the portal. I wanted to stay right here, in the dimension that I know and love.
I was contantly on guard for strange happenings: the floor falling from under me, a flash of light, an alien perhaps. Who knows what's in other dimensions.

I also really believed that if I ate enough carrots, I could see through walls. I think my grandpa told me that one.

I also used to stare at street lights in an effort to go temporarily blind, just to see what it is like.

True stories.

Every day here is an adventure...

I wouldn't have it any other way.

I was not ready for the day,
But the day didn't care.
The day gave me success.

There has been so many times
when I have been ready for the day
But the day has not been ready for me
And I have not met success

I try so hard but it seems that
It doesn't matter how hard I try
Because life is going to give
What it wants to give
Nothing more and nothing less

Hello friends, I'm back to Tally.

It was a good weekend, but I am not going to write much because I have come home to a lot of schoolwork (bleh).

I came in second place in the competition. The winner was Jessica Gist, a senior here at FSU. I have always greatly admired her playing, so I'm glad she has finally gotten the recognition she deserves.

I had a good time in general, but it was somewhat quiter and tamer than earlier years, as most of the attending students from FSU were graduates (who tend to be more mature than us heathen undergrads).

I played for John Bailey, who is a nice guy, and I saw some people play for Jim Walker, who is almost a nice guy. Learned some new things, met some new people, made some new experiences, heard some new music. Not the best flute fair ever, but still a good one.

Hey dudes. I'm going to Orlando for the Florida Flute Fair. Won't be back till Sunday.

I really like the Florida Flute Fair. It's like a family reunion for flute players. I get to see all my long lost flute aquaintances.

There's also something about the atmosphere of flute conventions that makes me really hyper. It's like, if I can't show off my playing, I have to show off my personality...or something. It's strange. Something in the air.

Anyway, I (along with three other FSU flutists) am playing in a competition there, so wish me luck! May the best musician win.

Every day I get a little more nervous. Seeing my colleagues play at wind seminar today really got the butterflies going. Not because of how they played, but because I know it will be me up there soon.

Still, it's a great piece, and I have a statement to make. That's really what it's all about. Whether I get first place or last place, it doesn't really matter. It's all about the music.

(P.S. I've worked really hard on this piece. I mean really hard.)

Happy 2000th post!

SAVANNAHS HATE
FIRE IN MY HEAD
TOWNHOME HATE
RENTTTT
AHHHHHHHH

I found this quote as I read during a practice break near midnight tonight:

"He who wishes to excel in music must feel himself a perpetual and untiring love for it, a willingness and eagerness to spare neither industry nor pains, and to bear steadfastly all the difficulties that present themselves in this mode of life."
-Quantz, 1752

Funny how this still applies amazingly well 256 years later.

P.S. This year's FFA young artist competition will be without a doubt the highest playing level the competition has ever experienced. I guarantee it.

Probably my favorite hymn:

Come, ye sinners poor and needy,
Weak and wounded,
sick and sore;
Jesus ready stands to save you,
Full of pity, love, and power.

I will arise and go to Jesus,
He will embrace me in His arms;
In the arms of my dear Savior,
O there are ten thousand charms.

Come. ye thirsty, come, and welcome,
God's free bounty glorify;
True belief and true repentance,
Every grace that brings you nigh.

Let not conscience make you linger,
Nor of fitness fondly dream;
All the fitness He requireth
Is to feel your need of Him.

Lo! th'incarnate God, ascended,
Pleads the merit of His blood;
Venture on Him, venture wholly,
Let no other trust intrude.

Today was the most refreshing sermon I have heard in a while. We had a guest priest from Pensacola, and he opened with these words:

"My message tonight is simple: We are Christians."

It's gotta be a joke.
I can't believe it.

Write about Rodrigo in English, foo!

I have a couple topics that I am very excited about this semester. I am writing my history paper about Rodrigo, who is an often under-appreciated composer(ESPECIALLY WITHIN THE ENGLISH-SPEAKING WORLD) and his Concierto de Aranjuez.

I am giving my informative speech about why people hate the Yankees!

Also, I agreed to be a student representative on the COM allocations committee. That means I decide where the money goes, or something...

"Congragulations"

Why do I keep this email in my inbox?

Because it says congragulations.
And that, my friends, is funny.

Piccolo in wind orchestra gives me headaches. I tried wearing an earplug today but then I couldn't tune or balance. I'm pretty sure I am going to have some kind of hearing damage soon, if I don't have it already.

There's a pair of brown women's flip flops in my apartment. They're not mine, and they're not Rebecca's, and we have no idea whose they are.

It's a strange predicament. Who would come to my apartment and leave with no shoes? I don't get it. They've been here for a couple months, and nobody has claimed them. If you are missing a pair of brown flip flops, maybe check if they are here?

I wrote a collection of limericks about some of the guys in my life. These aren't even neccessarily people that I know very well, just people who happen to make good limerick topics. I also wrote a couple who aren't about any in particular, they are just made to be funny. Here is one of them:

Persistence is the valuable key
To getting what you want, don’t you agree?
But it’d make him blue
If he ever knew
That I wish he wasn’t persistent with ME

Here's my political spiel for the year:

I don't think Hillary would make a good president, and I'll tell you why. It has nothing to do with her own capabilities. I think she is an extremely smart, capable woman. The problem lies with the men of the country. Men do not look at women the same way they look at each other. They would not respect Hillary. I'm old enough to have seen that in general, men just do not respect women. I know that's a judgement statement, and I have stopped thought, but I have seen it. Even the nice guys, the ones who seem to have a little respect--you get them when their guard is down, and they'll start talking about the women's role in the home and with the children, etc.

I meant to write more about this, but I just got bored with the topic, so I'll leave you with a little quote I heard long ago from my friend Will:

"A woman's place is in the house...of representatives."

I have a few confessions to make:

1. In general, I like listening to piano recitals more than flute recitals.
2. In general, I like listening to band concerts more than orchestra concerts.
3. I really like the sound of viola.

There ya have it. Ashley's deepest, darkest secrets, REVEALED.

BLEH

I'm excited about wind orchestra! It's gonna be fun!...and stressful. I haven't played piccolo regularly since high school (and I haven't played in a band since freshman year!), so it's about time I hone my skills. I love band music. It's always so interesting.

For one of the weirdest experiences of your life, go watch Sweeney Todd and then immediately listen to some Enya. CRAZY.

You know what they say about flutists being visciously competitive and backstabbing girls? Well, I don't think it's true. In my ten years of flute playing, I have met very few backstabbing flutists. It's true that there is a lot of competition, but only because there are a lot of people who all want the same thing and work very hard for it. But that doesn't make people mean. In all the auditions I have taken, the people I meet are friendly, helpful, and supportive, even though I am their very competition! In addition, the few backstabbing flutists I HAVE met in my life, well, I hate to say, but they tend to be DUDES. The girls are always friendly!

So just to let you know. I have a high opinion of the flute spirit.

Well, I'm back from the OPO audition (though I haven't unpacked yet, because I am lazy. Also because after driving for four hours you just don't feel like unpacking).

You know already that I sent in a tape and got into the semifinal round, which I consider a really really huge acccomplishment in itself. The competition was stiff when I got there. There were 12 people altogether in the semifinal round, most of whom had played in the prelims in the morning. From what I could gather, most of these girls (and one guy) were grad students from conservatories around the US: Carnegie Mellon, Boston, Juilliard, etc. I also met someone from Miami. I'm pretty sure that at 20 years old I was the youngest person there. By a lot.

I knew as soon as I heard some of the others warming up that I didn't have much of a chance of even advancing. These people were GOOD. I'm not so sure I deserved to be there, and if I did, then just barely. I did my best and kept my cool throughout the audition, but as I anticipated I did not advance to the finals.

Again, though, I am doing these auditions for experience, and that is exactly what I got out of it. I feel really great about getting into the semifinals. The others need and deserve the job more than me right now anyway. I pray for a few things before every audition, no matter how large or small: for the audition to be fair, for everyone to do their best, and for the most deserving to win. I think that's what happened here, and I'm satisfied. It was good to spend a little time at home again, too, though I really only was there overnight.

Also, I got a speeding ticket.

Dad: "So all the women are going to vote for Hillary, and all the black people are going to vote for Obama?"
Mom: "Yeah"
Dad: "Who are the black women going to vote for?"

I'm home.

We have really nice silverware.

It was night. I was with my extended family, roasting marshmellows at a campfire at Letchworth. I loved that place. I loved the crackle, the smell and warmth of the fire. I loved being with my family, playing games, feeling included. I loved being outdoors, sitting on plastic lawn chairs, eating marshmellows. I couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 years old. Maybe a lot younger. We were playing 20 questions, and I had a good idea for an item.

"A box," I whispered to my dad.
"That's a good one!" my dad said.

"Is it...a box?" my uncle asked. He was chastised by the rest of the family. It was then that I realized that I had probably whispered a little too loudly. Either that or my family can read lips.

Distance is so maddening sometimes.
We make all these friends in high school. Create solid bonds of friendship. And then suddenly one day it's all over: we all split up and go to different schools, sometimes hours apart, sometimes days apart, and almost always a long-distance phone call away, only to see each other when our breaks happen to coincide....when we aren't off visiting aunts and grandparents in other states...

Unless you live in the same town your college is located, college life is a split life, and in my case, two very very different lives. It's just hard sometimes, constantly saying "goodbye, I love you, and I hope I will see you again." I know God has a plan, and in this case it's not so hard to see the outlines: as the saying goes, distance makes the heart grow fonder, or something of the sort.

Someone older and wiser than I once told me that gradually my high school friends will drift away to their different paths. That someday my home life will be unrecognizable from what it once was. Maybe this will still happen, but I'm not seeing it right now.

I'm grateful that I have such good friends in both of my lives. You know who you are. I'm just sad that we have to part so many times. My heart breaks a little bit every time.

Especially this time.

Norah Jones' newest album is her best so far.

One more and she could make a best of album!

I love life so much.

I know that life is not always movies, beach, free donuts and the Panga Gang, so when it is all of that and more....you gotta feel good about it.

Makin' my last night count.
Goodbye, dear home.
Goodbye, dear friends.
I sure hope I will see you again.

I love you guys. I mean it. Be safe.

Enya teaches me what music therapy is.
Now I understand.

Happy happy new year
From all of us to yoou
We wish it was our new year
So we could party too
hey!

You'll pay for satisfaction somewhere along the line

I had a dream that a friend of mine said to me, "You can choose the next one." He whispered it, like it like it was a secret. I don't know what "next one" he is talking about....but I have an idea. And choice it always good.

Of course, dreams don't really mean much when you come back to reality. But sometimes I like to pretend that they do.

I need to practice.

I don't want to go back to school. Stress...boo! Who needs it?

I am amazed more and more as the years go by at the welcoming nature of the Jarvis home. Really, I can't believe that such a great family exists. Thank you, Jarvises, if you ever read this!

(I need sleep, you might be able to tell. I stayed up far later than ever before. This is the one day of the year when I allow myself that luxury...if you can call it a luxury.)

Das letzte Tag des Jahres...viel Glueck.

Ich erinnere mich an diesen Tag, vor viele Jahren. Gute Leute, gute Zeiten. Einige schlechte Zeiten auch...

Heute Abend...wer kennt? Nur Gott...

Ich liebe Leben.

I love it here. I really do.

I didn't want to say this, but bottling things up isn't healthy.

I sound terrible. Just ghastly. I didn't play for almost two whole weeks, and my sound has gone to the dogs.
I know that my sound will come back in time...but do I have enough time?
I need to practice more!
OPO, FFA, various recordings and ensemble auditions are coming up.

This makes me sad.

Okay, I said it. Sorry for being a downer.

The love of EVILoution has its evil evil roots
Monkeys are bad people
and so are you

Merry Christmas, friends! Remember remember what all this celebration is for. God becoming man. The birth of the savior of the world. Jesus Christ.

P.S. Sometimes it really gets to me that I can't listen to music and practice at the same time. I'm having a hard time turing off this new Enya CD.

I LOVE all my gifts!

The Clark Brothers...sigh.

I think I'm in love.

The past week or so has been simply amazing. As you know, I went on a cruise with my family. About 16 or so altogether, I never actually counted, but it seemed that everywhere I turned there was another family member.

We cruised to Cozumel, Mexico, where we visited Mayan ruins. So cool. I mean, you learn all about this stuff at school, but it all seems so distant, like everything was SOO different back then. But it really wasn't...visiting the place where the Mayans lived made it much more real to me. They had the same beautiful view that we have now, the same crystal clear blue water, the same palm trees and the same sun...

Getting to the excursion was a problem. We took a water taxi for a 35-minute ride there and back (no other choice, as we were traveling from the island to mainland Mexico), and it was pretty darn terrible. The boat rocked so much that they gave out barf bags BEFORE the trip. I cried by the end because my stoamch just couldn't take any more. Worst boat ride ever, pretty much.

The other excursion we took was at Belize. Rappelling and zip lining. SO AWESOME. I would love to do it again. We zipped through the RAINFOREST!! There's another place you hear about all the time at school. I've been inside a rainforest!! It was so quiet in there, so still. And I didn't see any animals besides some very vicious-looking ants. It's crazy, you think rainforest and you think life...but all I saw was a great expanse of green.


Getting there was sad. We took a 90 minute bus ride to get to our destination, and the tour of the Belize homes was not encouraging. Poverty makes me so sad... Every time there was something nice in the city, our tour guide would tell us that it was a gift from a different country. Canada gave them the bridge we drove over and the water treatment facility, another country gave the beautiful statue in the center of town. Vitually all the houses had bars over the windows to protect against thieves.

In addition, there was an ORANGE GROVE in the middle of the rainforest. I saw with my own eyes the destruction of the rainforest for money. No so simple as you might think, though...you travel through, and you see the beautiful rainforest as well as the human poverty, the rainforest as well as the reason for destruction. Seems like there must be a better way...
(I know I'mn rambling now, try to stay with me).

On either end of these excursions was a day at sea entirely on the ship. These days were great. I would read my book in the sun, eat free food, soak in the hottub, climb the rock wall...I know that it sounds boring but these days flew by. Mainly because I would sleep until noon.

Also, my waiter was awesome.

Yesterday was yet another successful Christmas party. Woo! We all had a good time spreading Christmas cheer, I think (and stealing each other's white elephant gifts). Gold ball makes hands bleed.

The end.

Parties are only awesome if awesome people attend.
Don't thank me...
thank yourself.

Just back from the cruise. Minus some serious bouts of seasickness, it was TOTALLY AWESOME! Stories to follow. For now though, I have business to attend to.

P.S. I somehow managed a B in music history! I knew I wasn't the favorite for nothing.

I miss Bernie already, lol.

CRUISE TOMORROW EEEEEEE!!!!!

The guy who cuts my hair is hilarious. He's this 40-something very Italian man named Vittorio. He's got a thick accent, and everytime I get my hair cut (like twice a year) he asks me about my boyfriend, even though most times I don't have a boyfriend. Today he told me that since I'm a good girl, I need a bad boy. Then he proceeded to keep asking me if I was interested in older men (implying that I would go out with him). I told him I basically like guys my own age. He was very dissapointed.

...really good haircut this time, though. It's pretty short, but I like it.

Catch you guys on the flip side.

p.s. the PSJ library is terrible.

You guys have no idea how happy I am to finally be back and done with the semester. It was a tough one. I've been literally dancing around my room since I've been home.

No work this winter!!!

And a 5-day cruise coming up, starting this Saturday!!! 5 days full of Aztec ruins, rappelling, food, fun, and family!! And NO FLUTE for a week while it is sent away to get a COA. WOOO!!!

I am so psyched about these next three weeks. It's gonna be so greeeat. Like Frosted Flakes.

(p.s. The other day, I realized for the first time in my life that Tony the Tiger says "they're grrrrreat!" because tigers say "grrrr." Ich bin intelligent.)

You know, sometimes you win in life and sometimes you lose.

I lost on my paper.

"This is a nice essay--accurate in its information, well organized, and clearly written. It's just not on the assigned topic, which was the BAROQUE.
F D "

He put an F an crossed it out just to make me feel worse, I think. Like...you ALMOST failed this paper...but out of the goodness of my heart I will give you a D instead.

Can't say I wasn't expecting it though...

Well, it's probably a C in the class. I guess there's a first time for everything.

Time of post: 8:00 PM
Time of exam: 7:30 AM

t-minus 11.5 hours and counting

It's crunch time.

You know what I learned over the past few days?

Papers are not so stressful if:

-they are on a topic that intrests you
-they require no research, only knowledge
-you write them over a course of four or more days

Music theory rocks, and so does Brahms.

I love Florida so much. I love it love it.
I love that it is early-mid December and the high today was probably near the eighties.

I hate the cold. It makes my hands crack and bleed, it makes me tired all the time, it makes me never want to get out of bed, it makes me carry around giant coats, and it's COLD!

I would be happy if the weather every day is like it was today: perfect.

I love the beach. I love the palm trees (though you don't see many in Tallahassee). I love the sandals, the tanks tops. The open windows in the middle of December. The Florida lifestyle.

Sometimes we don't stop to think about how lucky we are to live here (for those of you who live in Florida). I hear about my friends in the north who have been trudging through snow in 20 degree weather EVERY DAY, every time they walk outside...finals have been cancelled, flights have been delayed...and here we are in Florida, still walking to school in shorts and a hat to keep the sun out of the eyes...it's incredible the blessings we have that we never even think to acknowledge...

I am going to be so sad when I inevidably have to move away someday...move somewhere up north, where it's cold, always cold, even in the summer...grad school or a job, sooner or later I will have to leave the land I love...

For now, though, I'll enjoy it while it lasts.

HAHAHA ICH SPRECHE DEUTSCH!
Diese macht mich toller als dich.
Du verstehest nicht!...Du sprechest nur eine Sprache!! HAHAHA!
(Wenn dein Name Jon Brown ist...du verstehest, dass ich komisch bin).

Mein Pruefung ist Heute! Ahhhh!!!

Ich sollte wirklich jetzt studieren, aber ich wünsche nicht zu. Sooooo....wenn ich nach Hause gehen, wird ich "Folkus Deutsch" ansehen...hehe. ICH WILL NACH HAUSE GEHEN!! Das Studieren ist zu viel Arbeit...auch, ich möchte üben, aber ich habe keine Zeit.

:(

I think that one of the reasons this life is so hard sometimes is to make us desire heaven all the more.

It's probably a good thing that tetris isn't working today.

19th century styles paper status: almost two pages completed (out of five)

History status: one and a half chapters of review still to write. All chapters still to study!

German status: haven't started studying yet! Independent learning still to do.

My bike got stolen.
AGAIN.

I know nothing here is really mine. Maybe the person who stole it really needs it more than me. I'm a communist at heart. Share all our blessings.

But still...
I wish they wouldn't steal my bike.

Please, can you stop stealing my bike?
Pretty please?

Two hour naps and RUF Chirstmas parties are good cures for after-bad-paper depression.

I am so happy right now. What a great night.

RUF makes my life better.
It can make your life better too.
(hint hint nudge nudge)

11:35 PM
Final WC: 1,989

It's actually not a bad paper and it's a shame that I have no chance of getting a good grade on it.

This makes me very sad.

10:50 PM
WC: 1956

Still got the bilblio to go

and I think I am dying just a little knowing that I am doing all this work and I will not get anything back for it because I am writing about the wrong century
well, nothing except knowledge

why warum pourquoi porqué 왜 γιατί waarom 为什么 perchè なぜ porque почему

9:50 PM
WC: 1582

still the whole Counter-Reformation to discuss.

just realized that my topic is a completely inappropriate topic because it's about Renaissance music, not Baroque music.

oops.

guess I will not be getting a B in the class after all.

I really don't care at this point.

I just want to finish my paper.
and the class.

8:50 PM
WC: 1277

7:40 PM
WC: 940

4:00 PM
WC: 704

11:00 AM
WC: 664

Today has been a very strange day:

Hi Mr. Lutgens,
This is Ashley Stahl, a student at FSU. I applied to the FFA advanced
masterclass, and I was just wondering if you know who is in yet. Some of my
peers have heard already, and I thought it strange that I didn't get any info
yet. Just wondering!
Thanks a lot,
Ashley


I tried contacting you, but did not reach you! Congratulations! you are a winner! Letters went out late due to a death in a family of one of the judges.

Congrats.,
Karl

-------------------------------------------------

Dr. J:
"I would be suprised if you don't recieve an A in the class."

-------------------------------------------------

Congratulations to all who auditioned for the GALA Recital.

Those who were selected to perform are listed (in performance order) below....

....Concerto Mvt. 1 by Jacques Ibert - Ashley Stahl, flute and Yu Chien Chen, piano

-------------------------------------------------

Dear Ms. Stahl,
Thank you very much for submitting a CD in consideration for the Orlando Philharmonic's upcoming Principal Flute audition. Your CD was listened to and judged by the 7 member woodwind audition committee. I am pleased to tell you that your audition received enough votes for you to be advanced to the semi-final round of the audition, to be held on January 10, 2008....

.....Congratulations, and thank you again for your interest in the Orlando Philharmonic Orchestra.

-------------------------------------------------

What

This does not correspond to my health. Emotionally, I'm up in the clouds. I feel like I did the first time I made all-state as a freshman in high school. I was so excited that I asked my band director if I could use his phone to call my mom during class.
But physically, I feel like the life has been drained out of me. No worries, I know I will feel better by the time I wake up tomorrow. I know because I feel like this once every month...this month just happens to be a nasty one.

Hey guys
The Orlando Phil liked my playing
That makes me cool

Aaron Copland makes my life better.

Sigh....
Always so much work....

Today I had my final conducting project and my 19th-century styles presentation. I was so nervous for them that I woke up about 5 times last night thinking about Brahms and Nimrod.

Can't really tell if the presentations went well or not, but I did my best so I guess I'll take whatever they decide to give me...grades are such a funny concept. I mean, coming into conducting I really knew nothing about the subject. Now I know quite a bit. And I will somehow be assigned a grade on how well I learned to conduct. It's just funny that we get grades for learning things.
(I don't know if this is making any sense. Like I said, not much sleep last night).

Still to do:
Write hist paper (by Friday)
Write 19th century styles paper (next Thursday)
German Plauderai
German exam (next Tues)
Hist. exam (next Thurs)

Gala audition, recitals, normal homework, finish getting flute notebook together, blah blah blah...all the normal stuff.

Oh man. It never ends. Until two weeks from today...

Always remember
The first of December
For that is the day
That Ashley could FINALLY play
That excerpt for piccolo,
The Tchaik 4 solo.

It's been a long and hard war. Every practice session was a battle that I could win or lose. I would win the battle if I made progress by the end of the practice session; I would lose the battle if I gave up in the middle, frustrated, dejected, cursing Tchaikovsky, and wanting to never play piccolo again. I have to admit that I am pretty sure I have lost more battle than I have won.

But I kept trying. I would come back, days or weeks or even months later and pick up the excerpt again, ready to give it another try. This went on for how long?...I don't even know. At least three years now...three years of hatred for that excerpt...three years of mental block, three years of thinking, I will never be able to play this. It's beyond me. Three years of playing it poorly in EVERY SINGLE audition and losing the audition because of that...

And yet, I made progress the whole time. Inching every slowly towards my goal, oh, now I can play the ending run. Wait, now I can play it at a faster tempo. How is it that I can now play the opening more cleanly? You never know quite when these things happen, you just know that one day you take your instrument out and suddenly you can do things that were just beyond your reach before. It's a mystery to me.

And yesterday, the 1st of December 2007, I finally finally finally won the war. I played it at tempo. The F spoke. I played the run at the end. The opening wasn't a problem. I played it again just to be sure it wasn't a fluke. I played it again and again and again...and then I stopped playing it. I walked out into the hall, hoping that someone, anyone, would be there and I could tell them that I can finally play the Tchaik 4 piccolo excerpt.

Nobody was there. So I opened my arms wide and said to the empty hall, "I can play it."

I can play it.
FINALLY.

What do these items have in common?

Wood
A phone book
Two boxes of checks
Excerpts
A rent bill
Several boxes
Onions
Sugar
A beer bottle
Popcorn
A soda can
Eggs
Hot dogs
Marshmellows
A CD
A record
A shirt
A pair of pants
Two full ears of corn
Survey homework

Only four people know the answer. Can you add anything?