Hello readers! I guess I forgot to mention: I'm back in Titusville for the summer. I already miss everyone in Tallahassee like woah, but I truly do love it here at home, where the grass is green, the carpet is soft, and the silverware is shiny. I also eat a lot more nutritiously when I don't have to cook for myself. Pretty great.

I do feel a strong urge to return to Tally sometime in the near future. Maybe for the women's ultimate clinic the weekend of the 30th.

Work is the same as it has always been. Free, isolated, monotonous, and in all ways uneventful. NPR didn't replace their anchor, they just stream a Minnesota NPR station. Laaame. Still, it's good music. I got to hear the Butterfly Lover's Concerto today. So beautiful..

I think I am going to join the Orlando Ultimate League. One day a week of Titusville pickup isn't going to cut it for me. I need to see a disc flying through the air once again...

ALSO I'm planning a summer recital for Titusville again this year. It's still in the early planning stages right now, but I can tell you already that it's going to be a really fun and awesome program (how could it NOT be an awesome program, if I am choosing the music?). I'm thinking music of the Americas, with dances from the south and Americana of the north.

First game night of the summer tonight! GET PUMPED PEOPLE.

My body is craving ultimate.

The Road goes ever on and on
Down from the door where it began.
Now far ahead the Road has gone,
And I must follow, if I can,
Pursuing it with eager feet,
Until it joins some larger way
Where many paths and errands meet.
And whither then? I cannot say.

So, my post from a year ago has been published. How splendid! Now it's Future Ashley talking to Past Ashley:

Hello Ashley of the Past!!!
Nice to talk to you again! It's really great how things have worked out! Turns out that I'm going to Arizona State for grad school next year, and you are right--it IS very exciting for me! When you were writing that post, you thought that I might still stay in Tallahassee, but no...I'm moving on, moving out, jumping ship.

The audition process was...a process. Ha. I applied to five schools, traveled to and auditioned for four schools, got accepted to two schools, and eventually chose the one that I will attend next year, which incidentally was my favorite one. I'm a Sun Devil now!

My senior recital seems like such a long time ago--I guess a lot happens in a year! I got to play summer music with the best quintet, but I backed out on the Mozart quartet and took on Prokofiev Sonata instead. It was a challenge, but a rewarding one!

My parents and Craig are doing well, and by the grace of God all of my relatives are still in wonderful health. That is, except for the pets--there have been two recent doggie deaths in the family recently. It's IS sad.

You're right--the idol David battle is old news! Cook ended up winning. I think the finale for this season is this week. I haven't really been watching, so I'm not sure who it's between this year.

As for romantic relationships...oh brother. No, no serious relationships have cropped up since last year, but that doesn't mean that those boys have not brought me grief. I'm always breaking hearts and they are always breaking mine, nothing really changes there, it's just with different guys each time. It's something I've come to expect out of life, and it's really a good time if nothing at all is going on in that department.

Something you probably would never expect that happened this year is that I have gotten really into ultimate frisbee. Come to think of it, a year ago...I had no idea how to even play!!! Wow, it's amazing what can happen in a year. Yeah, I started playing pickup with the gang last summer, shortly after you posted, and then I took a class at FSU, then I found out about the Tallahassee ultimate league, I got more and more involved, and eventually it became an important part of my life. I actually just got back from a playing with a team at a tournament. Funny how it built up like that without me even noticing it.

Come to think of it, it's funny that I play ultimate at all. The first time I played, I absolutely HATED it. Remember that? I had no idea what was happening--so frustrating--and I was so bad that I told myself that I would never play again. Why do something if you're so terrible at it that you bring yourself down? But all my friends were doing it, and since I didn't want to be left out of the activities, I decided to give it another try. I was still bad, but I eventually learned at least the rules of how to play.

I'm definitely not built for the sport, what with no hand-eye coordination, no power, no height, and very little speed. Basically, I had no athletic talent (as a sidenote, I DO have one athletic talent--I'm quite flexible. But that really doesn't help at all in most sports). But eventually I came to love the game, looked forward to playing every week, and got much better, and now here I am. I've met a whole new group of people who really opened my eyes up to a new kind of happiness. I had resided in music box land (at school) and nerd land (at home) and now I have expanded to sport land (at play). It's a different world, and if you don't believe me, come along home with me and then to tournaments and I'll show you what I mean.

(It's late, I'm tired and man am I writing a lot tonight.)

Anyway, Past Ashley, I guess the moral of this past year has been: don't be afraid to try new things, because you never know where they will lead you. A year ago, I was just another flute player practicing hour upon hour in a little box, and that was the only earthly thing I could rely on. Now I've found something...else. I've found that balance between work and play. Let's hope I can keep it.

Allright I'm really tired so I'm going to stop typing now. Bye Past Ashley, it was really nice talking to you again.

Love,
Future (now present) Ashley

Well, Surf and Turf was pretty dang great. However, I don't feel like writing about all that at the moment, so I won't. Maybe you'll get the lowdown eventually. My guess would be no.

Right now, I'm packing all my stuff up, getting ready to move back home tomorrow. This is my last night as a resident of Tallahassee. I feel like I have wrapped everything up sufficiently. There are a couple loose ends that may or may not get be fixed--but aren't there always? I remember leaving high school with a few loose ends, and everything seemed to work out okay (or did it?? dun dun duuuuuuun).

Packing four years worth of stuff is not really that fun--that's why I planned to give myself an entire day to do it.

Today is May 17, 2008.

Yeah, that's right.
2008.
This is Ashley of the Past speaking.
I just figured out that blogger has this feature where you can write a post and have it scheduled to publish in the future. Cool, eh? So this is the Ashley of 11:00 PM, May 17, 2008, writing a note to Ashley of the Future, scheduled to publish May 17, 2009.

Dear Future Ashley,
What up dawg! How are things going? I hope you're in good health and not dead. How's the whole grad school thing going for ya? That's probably what you're concerning yourself with right now, but I could be wrong because I don't know the future! How was the year with Mark as a roomate? Crazy? Fun? Miserable? And your senior recital, how'd that go? Did you end up playing Summer Music and a Mozart Quartet?

I just watched LOST tonight. It was terrible. I thought I was going to find out how the Oceaninc Six got off the island, but I didn't! Do you still follow that show? Do you know how it ends yet? And American Idol...I find out next week whether David Cook or David Archaletta will win (I'm guessing Archaletta but I probably would like to see Cook win). But that news will be a year old by the time you read this!
How's mom and dad and Craig? Doing well, I hope! The Batcho grandparents celebrated their 53rd (I think) anniversary today, so when you read this it should be number 54! Wow!

Did you graduate? I can't see why you wouldn't, but again, I don't know the future!

It's crazy to think that by the time you read this, your life could be generally the same as it is right now, but it could also be soo different. I could win a job (I take OPO second flute audition in a week, we'll see how that goes!), or a beloved family member could die, God forbid, or I could be in a serious relationship (not too serious, I hope, as it will be less than a year long), or one of my good friends could get married, or any number of other things. The world could end before this post could even get published.

So look over what you have accomplished in the year, how different you are from what you were a year ago. The change could be great or small, I have no idea as I write this. But as I trust in Jesus Christ, I believe that it is for the best! So here's to the unknown future and everything it has to offer!

Love,
Ashley of the Past
May 17, 2008

Dude, I just realized that in an earlier post I wrote "asses" when I meant to write "assess." That might just be my funniest blooper ever!

Four years of the same old thing, of no change, and then BAM!!! Two solid months of nothing but new. And these are all new experiences, all of them. I have to wonder how much these welcoming strangers have really affected me--have I been changed for good?

Another ultimate adventure for me this weekend: Surf 'N Turf in Destin. I am SO excited! We're camping out for this one, and I don't have a tent of my own, sooo...I'm hoping someone will have some extra space for me. Oops..anyway, it's pretty much the first time I've ever been camping, so very exciting. I reeeeeeeeally hope it doesn't rain.

I'm feeling a lot more confident about my ultimate abilities nowadays. People throw to me more, I screw up less, my throwing is getting better (still has a long way to go...), and I know what's going on at least most of the time. And actually, I know for sure that I am faster and more athletic then when I started this nonsense. It's not only something I can feel--it's something I can SEE. A girl I was playing with the other day asked if I played soccer because I "look like a soccer girl." That was a real compliment to me--I look like I play a sport now! How about that?

Anyway, as far as the playing goes, I'm sure I will play much better at this tournament, if only because I feel more confident. It's worth a lot.

And then there's the party to look forward to...heh. I trust that I will have a good time. Good, clean fun--it's what I do. (Hear that, you guys? GOOD CLEAN FUN.)

So bye for now, I won't be posting at least till Sunday, and then I'm sure I'll be tired like no tomorrow. You know, from running for two days straight.

P.S. To body: don't get injured. That's an order.
P.P.S. I've never been on a team before this year. I love it.

BYE

So many farewells...

Embracing the city--neither of you wish to leave, but it's late, it's late, and you both have been forced to admit that it is time to do what must be done. And so you part little by little, feeling the sting of longing with each inch of separation, holding on until only your fingertips still faintly meet...and then, you're apart, and you're left alone to ponder upon departing from that which you loved so dearly.

Say you to me:
"You're a bird with an eye for anything shiny."

I guess what goes around comes around, huh? You reap what you sow and all that?

I think my biggest problem with sin (besides envy--that's a big one for me) is not taking charge of my life. I don't listen to my gut--too often I just go with the flow, don't really think about the implications of what is happening in the present moment, and when I eventually find out what the implications are, it's too late. I didn't stand up for myself, for what I believe is right, when it could have made a difference. And eventually what I could have prevented has come to pass, and I must pay. In more ways than one.

In January you've still got the choice
You can cut the weeds before they start to bud
If you leave them to grow higher, they'll silence your voice
And in December you may pay with your blood

My heart hurts.
(A little.)

Today's national limerick day, apparently. These are the best kind of poems in my opinion. I've posted this before, but I like it so much that I'll post it again. I wrote this a while ago (not about anybody in particular, don't get your panties in a bunch):

Persistence is the valuable key
To getting what you want, don't you agree?
But it'd make him blue
If he ever knew
That I wish he wasn't persistent with ME

So, surprising my mom was all it's cracked up to be.

Man, the Club Pub on Tennessee has probably the best-looking patrons out of all Publixes in the world. If FSU's got one thing going for it, it's attractive people, no joke.

Oh, and I got all A's this semester. I ended with a 3.9 GPA exactly, if anyone cares. Which you don't.

I think it's safe to say now...I came home to surprise my mom for mother's day! Still haven't seen her yet, that elusive mother, but I will, and it'll be so great. This might be my best idea ever.

It was kind of a nice drive this time. Gave me time to think, to transition, to sort out, to asses. And music too...music can be good for the soul. I listened to this CD, the Shakespeare in Love soundtrack, and the opening title is really so uplifiting, it's almost like you can breathe in the music, feel its healing power flowing through you like air...

(Edit: the word I was looking for was process, but I couldn't think of it that late at night. Gave me time to process all the stuff that has been going down.)

But not in the old way!

The cruise...

We spent two days at sea and two days on islands. Our room was really awesome, with two bathrooms and a balcony. The food was unbelievable. One of the three pools on the ship had a theatre-sized screen in front of it so you could watch movies while swimming.

The shows were the best I've ever seen on a cruise. Special effects out the wazoo, Disney songs and characters, and of course really good dancing (and singing). No live musicians though! And I got to see Earth. It was really good, some really amazing shots there, and really can't back away on James Earl Jones, go see it.

What else...there were a lot of kids there. The demographic was pretty much the same as you see at Dinsey theme parks. That's okay though. I like kids.

I had lobster twice. I laid in a hammock for 4 hours. I got a facial. Be jealous.

I think I gained weight. I can feel it.

Anyway, now I'm back, and I'm pretty much ready to party every day till I start work on the 20th. YOOOOOO

It's late. I'm tired. Cruise was great, maybe I'll tell you about it later (in 10 words or less, as Sam suggested), now I'm back in Tally. I drove here bearing an inexplicable sadness. Maybe I'll be able to explain someday.

I graduated. Congratulations, me!

To celebrate, I'm going on a Bahama cruise vacation with Mickey Mouse and three friends for four days! Yeah, I'm pretty awesome.

I'll tell you all about it on Thursday...maybe.
For now, though, peace out loyal readers and take a break from my craziness for a while.

P.S. I love Sunday secrets.