This semester looks very promising for me. I'm taking 16 hours (which is lower than usual, I usually take 17), and I have an even amount of four hours (not credit hours, but actualy hours spent in class) of class per day, except on Fridays when it's only three.

I talked to PA about repertiore and my recital and compeitions yesterday, and thinking about all of it makes me very excited. This semester has so much potential!! And with only four hours of class per day, I am able to practice probably more than I have any other semester (at least until Into the Woods starts--that'll take all of my time just like Sweeney. But it's worth it.).

I'm studying A LOT of music. I am going to need all that practice time. And all of the time I am not practicing, I will need for homework. Music history and german are both going to be a lot of work. 19 century styles would be a moderate amount of work, but since I am so slow, it's going to be a lot for me. And conducting will also be a bit of work. So everything said, I think I am going to have the perfect amount of time to do all that I need to do (and get sleep!), as long as I don't stray off course.

Also, I hope that accompanists work out for the best this year. Please be good to me accompanists, don't cause me any uneeded stress.

I am a principle in philharmonia, and after talking to my teacher, I learned that it wasn't by default. There was stiff competition out there! Yay me.

Ich kann nicht; ich habe eine Probe.

So here's a secret story that you can't tell anybody even though it's on the Internet.

I didn't have some of my audition music until a couple days before the audition.

I was practicing like two days ago (Sunday, I think) and I walked out into the hall to take a break. I heard a flute player in one of the rooms pounding away on a piece that one of our excerpts is from...but it wasn't the excerpt itself. This got me wondering...is there something I'm missing?

I knocked on the flute player's door and asked if that section of the piece was on the list, and to my dismay, it WAS! There were like four additional sections of music I had not prepared that were on the audition list. Stuff from Petrushka, Daphnis, Capriccio Espagnol, and the Bach Aria (which I did know about already).

I freaked. I borrowed her music and copied what I didn't have yet, and I practiced it heavily the next two days.

As I was warming up for my audition today, I heard another flute player warming up...same situation. I didn't have the music she was playing, and it was on the list. So I ran and copied the piece, taking away about 10 minutes of warm up time, and of course it ended up being asked for in the audition, and since I had only looked at it for a total of about two minutes, I didn't play it too well.

Everything else was okay, though.

Stephanie walks into conducting class late

Dr J: What were you doing, scraping reeds?

Oh man. My day hasn't even started yet, and I'm not having a good day.

Well, I'm back, and even though it's only 10:20 or so, I am totally exhausted. It's been a very long day, to say the least.

I played well at the audition. I did. I played my flute excerpts better than I had even imagined, and I guess I played my piccolo excerpts as best as I could expect. My nerves played no part of the audition--not a problem at all. I felt in control of the situation, and that alone made it a winning audition for me. Every audition I've taken so far has improved, so I'm making progress--that's exactly what I've set out to do at such an early stage in my career. I mean, realistically if I won this audition (which, if you couldn't tell, didn't exactly happen), I wouldn't even be able to take the job (if I wanted to get a degree anytime soon).

In addition, the commitee asked my to play one of the piccolo excerpts again (making changes the second time), which I take as a good sign.

I think it's time to face the facts, though--I need to improve my piccolo playing. I played as well as I could in my audition, but I realized that in terms of piccolo, even my best is not very good (at least not good enough). I need to improve control, my Tchaik 4, my stability in the high register. I need to learn and study more excertps. It may just be my piccolo, but my playing is not up to par. Not where it should be.

Anyway, the trip was fun. I traveled with two of the coolest flute grad students, and we stayed at a relative's house which provided all the luxuries we could require--so much nicer than a hotel. We even had a hot tub (WONDERFUL for relaxing before an audition). A good time was had by all.

I'm happy, much happier than my last audition. It went well.

A few changes I will try to make this year:

1) Go to sleep at the same time every night, which is
2) An early time (like 10:00...hey, I did it in high school) so that
3) I can give myself more time in the morning, and
4) Show up to my first class on time and
5) Eat a big breakfast so that I don't get hungry halfway through the morning classes
6) As always, spend less time surfing the net. I have failed in the past.
7) Get accompanists early! I'm always the annoying soloist who begs accompanists to learn my pieces in a week or less. No more.
8) Go to RUF
9) Don't watch t.v. while doing homework
10) Practice 3 or more hours per day, 4 on the weekend.
11) Don't settle for recordings that I don't think went well. Record it again!
12) Practice excerpts every day. They're important.
13) Think of every performance as your last. Every one is important.
14) Speak more german!
15) No more chocolate right before bed.
16) Take regular breaks when practicing.

If I chose to give a secret to a dog, I would choose a dog who cannot talk.

Oh yeah....I like it here.

My room smells sweet, my bed is big and comfortable, and the music library has free music and recordings for me. Nobody wakes me up in the morning, and the practice hall feels like home.

The three of us taking the audition had a masterclass on the excerpts this morning. I didn't play very well.

There's a modem lying on the table.

Craig: want a modem?
Me: no

It's never been this hard to leave before.

A fan held up a sign in the Yankees game today. It was a picture of a car side mirror and inside it said

"Boston: Beware. Objects are closer than they appear."

I liked that.

Dear Future Ashley,
Get off the computer and go practice.

Love,
Past Ashley

When I am in a bad mood, the people who get hit the hardest are the people who love me the most.

We subconsciously know that they will always love us.

I emailed the personnel manager for the SW Fl symphony my resume and cover letter in order to audition on the 25th, and this is part of his response:

"This audition is open to all interested musicians but I have to ask as I see no professional experience on your resume, are you sure this is a good ideaon 9 days notice?"

Totally out of line if you ask me.

I spose I should tell youse guys about some Las Vegas.

The city, well, it was just like I expected except A LOT BIGGER. People would talk about "the strip" and I would envision something about as big as a strip mall. But no, it's a lot bigger than that.
The lights and everything were cool. Advertisements everywhere for shows, musicals, comedians, entertainers, magicians...and other genres. I saw some ugly parts of the city (they're kind of hard to avoid), but I don't want to go into that.

Each casino has its own scent because the sense of smell is so connected with the memory. Isn't that crazy?

The college campus was a moderate size, moderately pretty. THEY LOCKED THE PRACTICE ROOMS AT NIGHT AND ON THE WEEKEND. It drove me absolutely crazy. I would not go to that school for that very reason. And I saw signs all over the place stating that regular student shave to PAY ABOUT 50 BUCKS every semester to use the practice rooms. What??? That doesn't foster a very good environment for a high-level music school.

The festival itself, however, was pretty cool. The level was very high, I found out at the end where everyone was from. The schools included Juilliard, Eastman, Cincinnati, Rice, Northwestern, Peabody, Oberlin...just to name a few. Not a bad collection of people, huh?
Apparently there was someone else from FSU there, a grad bassoonist, I didn't find that out until the last day. Crazy.

I've been discovering over the years that FSU is a really good music college, but more that that, a really BIG music college. These people that I have met, they have no idea what a large school is like. I tell people that there are 40 flute players in the studio, and they simply do not believe me. These schools that I just listed, probably none of them have more that 20 flute players. It's good, in a way--lots of people, lots of ensembles, lots of opportunity. You can find ANY kind of musician. Want someone who plays ukulele? Harmonica? Banjo? Tenor recorder? I'm sure there's someone in the music school that can do it.

Anyway, back to Las Vegas, I put pics up of the festival and the city on facebook for anyone who would like to see my adventures. I took a picture of the casino and got in trouble, lol.

Yeah, the Steve Reich piece ended up being really cool. I really liked the large small ensemble. Everyone has a little imput, and with everybody's ideas together--I don't know, it's like the constitutional convention--more minds=better product. As for the music itself, well...it was interesting. It was. It was fun to play, but difficult in a different way than I have ever experienced.

As for orchestra, well it was just plain awesome. Certainly certainly better that what I play with at FSU. The conductor wasn't the nicest leader I've ever had, but in my mom's words, "his job is not to be nice." He knew music, he knew how to make the ensemble sound good, and he was very sensitive to detail. He brought out the best in us. We did the Prokofiev Classical Symphony without conductor, which was really cool and a new experience for me.

There was some drama (in the flute section, of course) but I feel that everyone took it very well, and I don't really want to say any more about that.

Shout out to Bradford and Kasia, my buddies, and to everyone else I met there. What a talented group of people.

All in all, it was a good experience, I had fun, furthered my career, yada yada yada. I've come back musically charged, like a battery, and I'm ready to release it out into the world.

I really have no sympathy for anyone who says he is bored.

It's 1:30 and I can't sleep because it's only 10:30 where I came from...

I stumbled upon a group called "add Ashley Stahl as a friend!" on facebook.

I have also been invited to the hispanic honor society at FSU.
?

I am really sad right now and I'll tell you why.

I recorded the two pieces I played on at the festival. They sounded AMAZING. Especially on the last movement on the Prokofiev. I just couldn't believe how good the orchestra sounded.

I came home and excitedly got ready to transfer the music from my minidisc to the computer and play it for my parents, only to find out that the whole Prokofiev had been recorded over inside my suitcase. I lost the whole thing, and there is no way of getting it back. And I'm pretty sure that I'm the only one who recorded it. I was going to find a way to share it with the whole orchestra.

It makes me really, really sad.

I know I shouldn't be sad. I had something extra, something that nobody else had. Now I don't have that, and in perspective it's no loss. But I really wanted to show my friends and family just how good that orchestra was. I wanted to hear myself play. I worked hard for that piece.

:(
:(
:(

I guess that no matter which way you look at it, the music is still a "material object," and I should not be as sad about losing it as I am.